Happy despite being alone. How to be happy every day. To be youreself

Galina Vishnevskaya is a woman with an unusually strong character and a difficult fate. She survived the blockade, the death of her son, and emigration. But she didn’t break down and, despite everything, she was able to find happiness. She said: "I happy man: I was given difficult trials and was given the strength to survive it, thank God.” Her perseverance, resilience, beauty and intelligence helped her achieve a lot. She sang on the largest stages in the world - Covent Garden, Metropolitan Opera, Grand Opera, La Scala, Munich Opera, etc. She lived in a happy marriage with Mstislav Rostropovich for 52 years and raised two daughters . Success and happiness were not easy for her - you will feel this when you get acquainted with her quotes. They are charged with such power that is involuntarily transmitted to everyone who reads them. We offer you 20 of the brightest.

Of course, childhood experiences shaped my character. Needless to say, my character was not sugar. If she set a goal for herself, she went ahead, defending her truth, her right, and then “at least there’s a stake on her head.”

The time was terrible, and those whose spirit was not defeated survived morally.

No matter what smoky dugout or wretched, broken club we performed, always an hour and a half before the start of the performance, the artists began to make up and dress as carefully as if they were about to appear on the most brilliant of stages... Here I realized that art is not crinolines, not fabulously happy kings and queens, but hard, exhausting work. And if you want to be a great actress, you have to be prepared for many, many sacrifices.

I had to go on stage every day. This taught me to constantly train, and since then I have been working and rehearsing every day all my life. The harsh school I went through at the very beginning creative path, helped me maintain my voice and stage form for so long.

Galina Ulanova danced Juliet until she was fifty-three years old, but I never saw a younger Juliet either on the screen or on the dramatic stage, not to mention the ballet.

Russian people can dance not only out of happiness, but also out of rage.

Again, I feel the whole of Russia behind me, that if I sing unsuccessfully, then it’s all over, Russia is lost... We’ve been raised this way since childhood, and we go on stage abroad looking like we’re covering a firing machine gun with our chest... The Motherland is calling!

Often, sitting in a box and listening to some performance, I watched the audience in the hall: what tired, meaningless faces! No interest in what is happening on stage. Artists are not applauded. They don't need this art. The lack of a culturally prepared audience in the theater led to the uselessness of outstanding conductors and outstanding vocalists. The public does not understand, does not distinguish between who is conducting today and who was conducting yesterday. She doesn't feel the quality. How much must an artist do his best on stage in order to shake up this tired, uninterested person in anything and make him listen to the performance and empathize! Therefore, the main thing in the opera was not the music, but the words spoken accompanied by music in order to convey the meaning and content of the performance. Hence the dramatization of Soviet art, exaggerated emotions, exaggerated words, gestures, forcing voices. Everything has to be stronger than it needs to be, otherwise the public won't understand you. When Soviet singers travel abroad, they are often criticized for their internal pressure, exaggerated playing, the harshness of their voices, and the lack of cantilena and vocal musical phrasing in their singing. But this is our style, this is the style of the Soviet theater. It is no coincidence that the music of Vivaldi, Handel, and Haydn is performed so little in Russia; they don’t stage Mozart’s operas, and for all the twenty-two years that I sang in Bolshoi Theater, only “The Marriage of Figaro” was performed on this stage. Because you need to listen to such pure music not with your nerves stretched to the limit and a party reprimand in your brain, but sitting calmly in a chair, surrendering to the bliss of perceiving eternal beauty.

A genius cannot be created, it can only be killed.

I am convinced that in order for a woman to look brilliant all her life, she needs a good, reliable husband, whom she could be proud of and walk with her head held high.

We are born to die. How we spend the time between these two events depends only on us.

In your youth, you can still find the strength to accept pokes and slaps with humor, but over the years, when your inner vision becomes merciless, life shamelessly reveals itself to you both in its ugliness and in its beauty. You suddenly inexorably realize that you have been stolen best years that he didn’t do even half of what he wanted and was capable of; one becomes painfully ashamed of oneself that one has allowed the most precious thing in oneself - one’s art - to be criminally humiliated.

The most important thing is not to give way to despair.

Nothing ever goes away. Everything goes nearby. This is a continuation of life. And Rostropovich will never leave my life. He's just been gone for a long time. He must come. All my life we met and parted. All 52 years old. He was returning from tour: “Wow, finally, I’m home!” The door will open, he will come in with a cello and say: “Finally, I’m home!”

If you want to do something, then first think about whether you want to rise up or fall down.

I don’t complain to anyone, I walk with my head up, in spite of all my envious people, and I stick out in their throats like a bone.

I created a wall around myself through which people could not get through to me, and I myself did not meet them halfway. This trait has always been in me.

Life has taught me to always be ready to stand up for myself, and over the years this need has turned into the need to create my own fortress, to be independent, inaccessible. Be able to close the door behind you.

For me, while performing a role, everything I do on stage is as important as a matter of life and death. If they cut off my head, only then would I not be able to finish singing the performance.

My parents didn’t live together, my grandmother raised me and affectionately called me “orphan.” Drunkenness and the street were constantly before my eyes. That's why I tried my best not to repeat the unpleasant experience. When I started a family, I began to raise my children completely differently. My daughters are my closest people. I can tell them absolutely everything and no one else. My husband has changed me a lot. After all, Slava had another family. His father and mother are musicians, they loved him very much. Slava lived in different conditions. With him I became a softer woman. And before our meeting she was harsh, sometimes even rude. This is all from a difficult childhood, from loneliness, from war. I was left alone during the blockade in Leningrad. My grandmother died, they found me barely alive. We had to survive, fight at all costs! Dreams helped. I imagined how the war would end and how I would sing on stage.

I also wrote about this technique—in difficult moments, imagining myself in the future. prominent psychologist and psychiatrist Viktor Frankl, who went through concentration camps: “In general, it is human nature to focus on the future. He resorts to this enlightenment in the future in his most difficult moments. Sometimes it becomes a kind of trick, a saving ploy in the most difficult moments. When I was completely unbearable, I imagined that I was standing at the pulpit in a large, brightly lit, beautiful, warm hall. I give a report - and the audience sitting in front of me in cozy, soft chairs listens with interest. And I'm talking about psychology in a concentration camp. And everything that oppresses and torments me now is somehow objectified for me, seen from above scientific analysis... This technique helps me to rise mentally above reality, to consider it as if it were already in the past, had already passed, and I myself, with my suffering, had already become the object of the most interesting psychological research that I myself had undertaken.”

How often do we understand that our low self-esteem prevents us from becoming happy? We don't believe in our capabilities, in ourselves. We are waiting for a miracle or outside support. We don't live for today. Life passes in pursuit of happiness running away from us... How to believe in yourself? What do you need to do to find inner harmony and increase your self-esteem?

There are simple rules, following which will make daily life interesting and rich.

How to learn to love yourself

Self-love needs to be cultivated, to cherish and cherish. You should understand: all people are born ideal, without flaws. Until society and the opinions of others begin to put pressure on a person. From childhood, patterns begin to be imposed on us, what is right and what is wrong. We look at glossy magazines and realize how far we are from the ideal. We listen to stories from life and feel insufficiently erudite.

The world around us is the way we see it ourselves

The main thing is accept yourself as you are with all your shortcomings.

Over the course of life, we can transform as a person, change, work on ourselves, develop and become self-sufficient. But under no circumstances should you dwell on your shortcomings. Love your weaknesses and never try to change to please others. Start working on yourself only when you want it. If people give you conditions under which they will like you, then this means that they will never like you, no matter what you do.

Your shortcomings should not be an obstacle to achieving what you want. Learn to believe in yourself and your capabilities.

How many examples do we see when a person of absolutely average intelligence achieves resounding success in life? It would seem that everything is going against him, but luck still finds him. We are accustomed to attributing such breakthroughs to chance, to a coincidence, forgetting that perhaps only his faith in himself helped him achieve his goal. He was not tormented by questions about whether he was worthy of what he strives for or whether he was good enough. He simply strived to win with all his might.

Many are tormented by eternal lack of money. Material problems literally fall on our shoulders. We see around us beautiful cars, large houses, luxury apartments under construction, but we ourselves live in a two-room “Khrushchev” apartment from paycheck to paycheck. This spoils our mood, we begin to think that everything is our fault, and we begin to regret missed opportunities. Our dissatisfaction with ourselves is growing every day; we see that everyone around us lives much better. We rarely think about the fact that millions of people would simply dream about our life. We don’t see those who have a much harder life than us.

Be happy with what you already have, the environment in which you are. And be grateful for it.

Every person has enemies, haters, and there is no escape from this. Perhaps their hatred is due to the fact that they themselves are unhappy, or maybe they just have such a need - to find fault with people all the time. Be lenient with these losers and ignore their attacks on you. Wish them happiness in their life.

Treat others as if you were your own

Man is a social creature and without communication, most people feel uncomfortable. To be happy, you should not push people away, you should treat them with understanding and respect.

In romantic or friendly relationships, you need to give to people as much as you ask of them. Sometimes it is even worth making certain sacrifices for the sake of someone dear to you. No need to be selfish.

However, you need to recognize people who take advantage of you, show disdain, offend you, or cause pain. You should get rid of such an environment, and the sooner the better. They destroy your health, drain you emotionally and destroy your inner harmony. It’s hard to part with loved ones, but if they torture you and do it consciously, then nothing else awaits you except further pain. Do not believe that you can change a person until he himself wants it.

Whenever possible, try to help people in need. Helping others makes us better people and brings us happiness.

Sincerely rejoice in the success of others.

Envy is a very destructive feeling. Even if you think that success came to someone undeservedly, then just be happy for him and, perhaps, fortune will turn its face towards you.

Very often in relationships between a man and a woman, there is some kind of dissatisfaction with their partner. The eternal desire to change your soul mate leads to constant conflicts and, as a result, to separation.

Don't focus on someone's shortcomings, rather look for their strengths and love them with all your heart. After all, it is the differences between people that make relationships interesting.

Don't isolate yourself, communicate with people. If you are suddenly offended or rude, try to discuss it calmly. An open, sincere dialogue will help to understand the problem. Perhaps you just misunderstood something. Don’t keep grudges to yourself, over time they can turn into a big problem, for you first of all.

Do everything with love

Don't be afraid of change, listen to your heart and decide for yourself what you want from life. If you are depressed at work, try changing your field of activity completely. Open yourself up to new experiences and move forward.

Decide for yourself what you like and what brings you more pleasure. Find out what you need to do to get the career you want. Look for advertisements, carefully study the requirements for applicants and go towards your dream. Don't be afraid to lose, treat life as an interesting, exciting game. Never look at age - many successful people made a career after 40-50 years. As long as we are alive, everything is ahead of us.

Feel the freedom

Don't get bored in free time: Get yourself a hobby. Don't sit at home all the time. It is not without reason that the most terrible punishment is confinement in a solitary confinement cell. Long-term confinement within four walls leads to depression and psychological disorders.

Girls and women! Don't exhaust yourself with endless diets. It is important that you feel healthy and strong. Striving for an unattainable ideal will only bring disappointment. Don't be ashamed of yourself. Accept yourself for who you are and play sports, first of all, for your health.

External beauty is a subjective concept that is imposed public opinion and media

At the first opportunity, travel, even short distances. You can go through local attractions again, new impressions are guaranteed.

Don't be passive; you should take the most active position in life. Don't be afraid to take risks.

Good afternoon, dear readers! The quality of our life largely depends on how happy we feel. Frequent problems at work, quarrels with a spouse, unimportant child studies, boorish communication from a cashier do not contribute to the emergence of positive emotions. But you can rejoice even on the grayest day. Today I will tell you how to enjoy life no matter what. Simple and practical advice that can revolutionize your approach to happiness.

Find things that give you pleasure

It seems to us that we know ourselves very well. We understand what things we like and what infuriates us and drives us crazy. But it is not always the case.

Try sitting alone and remembering all the things you truly enjoy in life.
Don't be afraid to write down even the wildest and most incredible things. Maybe you enjoy walking around the city at night? Knitting, talking with a close friend, buying new things, good coffee in the morning, massage and so on.

Also, try to track those things that bring you joy. Did you play billiards for the first time and really enjoyed it? Great, add this activity to your list of enjoyable activities.

Try to pay attention every day to everything that makes you smile or feel joy.

Over time, this will help you focus on pleasant events and you will begin to notice more and more beautiful things around you. Our subconscious loves to play games with us. And sometimes it slips in exactly those things that we often think about, that we are fixated on. Use this to your advantage.

Remember that if you eat oranges often, sooner or later they will begin to disgust you. Don't overdo it in getting pleasure from this or that activity.

Expand your horizons

Learn something new every day. This will not only help you become more erudite and developed, but will also expand the range of activities that can bring you joy.

Perhaps you don’t even suspect that decoupage will become not only your hobby, but also your calling in life. And the pleasure you will get from this activity cannot be compared with anything else.

By learning new things, you train your brain and prevent it from stagnating. Train your memory and develop your thinking. In addition, if you try to apply something in your life, you will gain additional experience.

As you explore the world, you can meet interesting people who will fill your life with completely new motives. They will share their experience, lift the curtain on something previously unknown to you, and show the beautiful side of something new. Don’t be afraid to make new acquaintances, because you don’t know for sure why fate brought you together with this or that person.

I bring to your attention a wonderful article that will help you make the first steps to change yourself much simpler: “”.

Make the most of everything

Learning to see the good even in the bad is an extremely useful and important skill that every adult, educated person should have.

Firstly, you don't take mistakes and mistakes so seriously. This allows you to avoid getting depressed by another failure.

Secondly, you know how to turn everything into the experience you need.

We are used to more often scolding our lives for everything. Bad job, loneliness, terrible traffic jams, the vile character of the wife, disobedient children and so on. Believe me, in each of these situations you can find a positive moment.

A bad job is an excellent reason to develop yourself as a professional and move to a new job;
loneliness - independence, free schedule, complete control of your life;
terrible traffic jams - extra time to read your favorite books, a place where you can meet your soulmate, and so on.

Just don’t pull it by the ears. There are situations in which there really is nothing good. Know how to distinguish between reality, real experience, true successful moments and unrealistic expectations.

And of course, learn to enjoy the little things. Sometimes the smallest detail can make the whole day perfect. A pretty girl smiled on the bus this morning - here’s a great shot of your life that brought joy and positivity.

I recommend paying attention to the book Mikhail Labkovsky “I want and I will”. The author describes how you can learn to live in harmony with yourself, freeing yourself from unnecessary goals and tasks. Surely you can find useful advice in it.

What makes you smile? What is the most joyful moment in your life? What prevents you from enjoying every day? How do you encourage yourself?

Smile right here and now!
Best wishes to you.

People spend their whole lives looking for happiness, as if it were somewhere in a specific place. In fact, any psychologist or just a person who has lived for a long time can tell you that no matter where you go, you will not leave the one who is inside you. “You can’t run away from yourself,” says the proverb, and the conclusion suggests itself that we carry both grief and joy within ourselves and we ourselves are their cause. Being happy is not a process, it is your choice. You can decide today to change your life by discovering the source of happiness within yourself.

Be happy no matter what

What is happiness? Probably no one can answer unambiguously. They say that if you want to know what a person lacks, ask him what happiness is. For everyone, “being happy” means fulfilling your desire, and it will be completely different from the thoughts of other people. Of course, there are general parameters of a good life that almost everyone strives for: being born, falling in love, getting married, getting rich. But why, having received what we want, do we not rejoice for long, and the feeling of euphoria leaves us after a week or two?

Women's joy is a separate episode in the conversation about happiness, but it is from the fair half of humanity that we should take an example. The fact is that women are more capable of creating moods within themselves than men. Remember how we can come up with a scandal, borscht and a hat out of nothing! Women are simply created in such a way that, having perceived an idea, they can grow it to a universal scale. Therefore, it is easier for them to understand that the root of good and bad moods sits inside us and can be controlled. Remember: happiness is a choice! And if you decide to be happy, then you will have to work on yourself and your worldview. What prevents us from experiencing joy every minute of our lives? These are our thoughts, feelings of guilt, worries about the future, unfulfilled desires, need for something.

A person cannot live long in grief. One day you will definitely have a desire to give up everything and hide from the cruel world. This is where changing your mindset and maybe even your lifestyle helps! If severe blues set in, what can be done? Let it out, get angry, cry, or go for a run, swim in the pool, walk in the park, meet your parents or friends, play with your children. This is called "distraction from sorrowful thoughts." And after all, start building new paradigm your happy life. Answer these questions:

What's stopping me from being happy?
Who makes me unhappy?
Do I feel hatred, guilt, resentment, fear?
Why do I experience these emotions, do they have a basis?
What can I say about the problems I had 5 years ago?
What would I say about my problems that I have now, in a year?
How do I see my happy life?
What does my ideal day look like?

Creativity begins!

Imagine your best day, what would happen there, where would you go, who would you be with then. Once you come up with all this, you will understand what you need to change in your life today to feel better. And, of course, don’t forget about positive settings:

Life gets better every day!
I thank life for everything I have!
I give thanks for what I don't have! This means that everything will be, but better!
I'm happy!

Everything is very simple

That's it, dear friends. Did you think everything would be difficult? No, being happy is easy, you just need to want it.

Who cares what they think of you? If you are happy with the decisions you made, then you did right choice, and it doesn't matter what others say. Imagine how much effort you spend trying to read other people's thoughts, and still don't guess.

Listen to advice - please, but don't let others decide how to live.

2. Anger and resentment

The next time you catch yourself feeling this way, think about this: “Would I like to be the person I envy?” Surely not, you love yourself (even if somewhere very deep inside).

You are looking at someone else's life that you don't know. You have no idea what this person is thinking. Maybe when he dives into the pool of his private home, he hates himself or is wildly afraid of something? Maybe you, walking through the forest on a sunny day, experience much more pleasure than he does, basking on the snow-white sand in the Maldives?

Stop looking at others. If you feel good now, then everything is right. If not, make it good.

16. Uncertainty

Happy people tend to have a sense of self-worth (just don't confuse it with an inflated ego). They are happy with themselves and exude confidence.

There is no reason to doubt yourself. If you have traits that you hate, there are two ways: accept them or change them. Every person is everything at once: a libertine, a puritan, a lying bastard, and a gentleman. You choose who you want to be.

17. Dependence on others

No one will fill the emptiness inside of you. No one will make you positive and self-sufficient if you are unhappy with your fate. To share your happiness with someone else, you must first become happy yourself. So don’t even hope that your success is in someone else’s hands. Only in yours.

18. Past

Living in the past means burying your present. There were mistakes - okay, who didn't? Give your memories a magnificent funeral, remember only the lessons and...

19. Total control

Sometimes you just need to relax and let life take its course. You can't control everything, and you have to accept that. Otherwise, you will be constantly nervous, but in the end you will still not change anything. There are simply things that are beyond your control. They must be accepted as they are.

20. Expectations

People think that others should meet their expectations. That's bullshit. Nobody owes you anything, just like you don’t owe anything. No one should be polite, attentive, neat, honest, pleasant to talk to, clean, in the end. Nothing has to be perfect, amazing, unforgettable, but it can be. If it happens, great; if not, you won’t be upset. Be willing to accept whatever life throws at you and you will find happiness.