What personality traits you need to develop in yourself. How to develop the qualities of a successful personality. Ability to serve people

You've come up with a great business idea. You've even put together a detailed, well-thought-out business plan. It looks like you are simply doomed to success! Wait, though, it's possible that in addition to having a flawless business plan and start-up capital, you may need to stock up on something else. Before conquering new heights, you need to understand that for the implementation of a good idea in life, the most important thing is the people who will be engaged in its implementation. In other words, the success of your business largely depends on yourself.

So what separates natural born entrepreneurs from the rest of humanity? These are the qualities that determine your business success:

Determination: even a small team needs a person who would take on the role of a leader. Business owners need to be able to show that they can take responsibility for difficult decisions. Listening to advice and being willing to listen to others' opinions is very important, but in the end, the decision will be yours.

Creativity: In the business world, dreamers are by no means naive. They are able to come up with new things and think outside the box, find a solution where ordinary people would not look for it. The ability to intuitively recognize a potentially successful idea is as important in business as anything else: a good idea and an unconventional approach, beautifully packaged and correctly presented, is the key to success.

Courage: Even to start planning to start your own business, you already need to be a little adventurous. If you are not willing to take risks, many opportunities for growth and development of your company will pass you by. But don't confuse boldness with recklessness. The owner of the company must think through everything to the smallest detail and be able to calculate the risks.

Love for business: If your eyes don't shine at the thought of what you are doing, do not expect to be able to spark other people with your idea. Doing business is a complex business, and the only thing that will keep you from giving up and forgetting about your ultimate goal is your own enthusiasm.

Resourcefulness: As a rule, nothing in life happens exactly according to plan. Therefore, the ability to react quickly and make decisions in unforeseen situations is vital to running a business. Don't think you can predict everything, and be prepared to improvise when necessary.

Honesty: Be honest with your customers, partners, employees and everyone you have to work with, and most importantly, be honest with yourself. Don't set goals and deadlines that you can't meet, and don't sell a product that you don't have. The best marketing and branding strategy is to find what your company really has to offer, and then deliver it at its best.

Sociability: You don't have to be a professional speaker or become the best friend of everyone you meet, but you must be able to communicate with people. Going into your business, you will have to meet with a huge number of people, and, of course, it is better that they consider you a professional and a person who is easy to contact.

Dedication: you can't do things halfway. You must be willing to devote most of your time and effort to day-to-day responsibilities. Try to allocate your time in such a way that it is enough for both work and personal life, and keep track of the tasks that you set yourself for the day, week, or month.

Ability to predict: if you have your own business, you can no longer afford to live one day. At least on a subconscious level, you should plan and prepare everything in advance. As a chess player, you should consider your actions several moves ahead.

Flexibility: After you have already discussed and prepared everything, you will have to take a critical look at the work done and show healthy pragmatism. Committing to an initial plan that doesn't fit your current situation is unlikely to benefit your business. When communicating with clients, contractors, potential partners, etc. flexibility is valued much more than stubbornness and a desire to prove oneself right.

In the modern world, it is generally accepted that a successful person is one who has achieved a stable financial position. Is it really? Or is there a deeply unhappy, lonely and empty creature behind the mask of such a personality? Let's find out what personality traits are necessary to achieve success in life.

What kind of people can be considered successful?

What is success? If described verbatim, then this is the achievement of certain goals, accompanying luck. However, successful people themselves do not always represent the person who has received public recognition. Often, such people feel unhappy, despite such qualities as hard work, a person's purposefulness and assertiveness.

So who is a successful person? This is the one who fulfilled his true dream, lurking in the hidden depths of the soul. This is the person who is always ready for new discoveries and goals. This is the person who feels successful not only within himself, but is also successful in the eyes of the people around him. So what are the personality traits required to achieve success in life? We will discuss this below.

Love of work

A person's industriousness is a positive and assertive attitude towards various activities. This means that such a person is ready to give himself up to work, as they say, with a soul and in a big way. At the same time, such a person is not distracted by other activities and, as a rule, completes what he has begun to the end.

Hard work forms a personality from birth, therefore, parents often accustom their children to activities, starting with house cleaning and self-service. To begin with, the love of work allows you to achieve success in any business, because such a person does not seek an excuse for his laziness, but only gets rid of it and acts in spite of his weaknesses. It is believed that hard work is the key to success and good luck in life, therefore, in this article, this quality is in the first place.

At the same time, it is important not only to be industrious, but to choose only the activity that suits you. As a rule, assertive work is often favored by greedy employers who assign triple work to a subordinate, regardless of his health or needs. That is why it is important to be not only hardworking, but also to channel this energy in the right direction. Only in this way this personality trait, which is necessary for achieving success in life, will really help you.

Purposefulness

Another special trait that allows you to achieve success in life is striving for a goal. She talks about an object that always knows what he wants, and in his head he has a certain plan and a vision of the final of his race. At the same time, such a purposeful person will never leave the distance, even if such obstacles as lack of money, illness, loss of loved ones or other twists and turns of fate arise.

In other words, the purposefulness of a person is a belief in one's own activity, which is supported by indestructible arguments. Such a person will never give up his dream, even if he is under pressure from both people and circumstances.

A purposeful person proves that a core is formed inside him and a compass is formed, which allows him to navigate in the modern world. This is the type of people who passionately believes in their business and fights for the right to exist. After all, it is not for nothing that they say that the meaning of human existence is to set a goal for oneself and move towards it. Otherwise, our race can only be compared with animals that move in an endless circle: food - sleep - feces - copulation - the struggle for survival.

Desires and ambitions

First you need to understand these two concepts, because, despite their closeness, they are fundamentally different from each other. Let's start with desire, or lust. It represents a feeling that arises in a person who wants something, or someone. At the same time, it is associated with needs, lifestyle and already existing baggage (experience, property). The main feature of desire is that it is an excellent personality trait that is necessary for achieving success in life. However, sometimes this need remains only a thought, which will never grow into a goal.

Desire cannot exist without ambition, and those, in turn, without purposefulness. As a rule, everything starts small: a person needs something urgently and dreams about it at night. While some are absorbed in dreams, others begin to act, taking everything into their own hands. At the same time, this personal quality, which is necessary for achieving success, corresponds to culture and society. For example, if even 100 years ago people dreamed of the opportunity to communicate with family and friends, delivering mail instantly, today the goal of many people is to create artificial intelligence and find a cure for cancer. However, most people dream of only one thing - to make money. And it doesn't matter how, where and by what efforts. This desire was also formed by our society.

So what is ambition?

Ambition is a modernized and distorted form of desire that often manifests itself in selfish and ambitious people. Ambitious individuals receive satisfaction and are considered successful by receiving honors for their deeds. On the one hand, this is not bad, because such people are ruled by a goal and a desire to achieve unsurpassed success, to become better than anyone else. On the other hand, ambition often cloudes the mind and a person, having entered the first steps of his thorny path, begins to boast of achievements and take pleasure in belittling others for inaction.

There is ambition in every person, but not every one of us knows how to manage them. There is a type of people who yearn to be surrounded by society, and for this they direct their aspiration to the mass media. Others, on the contrary, may close themselves off from the outside world, because their ambitions develop into depression over time.

If you do not judge biasedly, then you can create a small picture of an ambitious person:

• Ambition grows into negative emotions that cause discomfort to others.
• Ambition can be nurtured in a child if parents put pressure on him from early childhood. This is due to the fact that being young, the married couple could not achieve certain success, thereby placing responsibility on their child.

How does it feel to be a leader?

Leadership abilities allow you to lead people. Others trust such individuals, because they make decisions for the team, often correct and logical. In the modern world, everyone pretends to take the place of the chief on the ship, but not everyone can cope with this task. Let's find out the most important qualities of a leader's personality:

1. This person is not afraid to take risks and put everything on the line. However, he does it wisely, analyzing all the facts, comparing them. Risks help you either change your life for the better, or lose everything you have. But a real leader is not afraid of this. At the same time, he does not endanger the lives of his wards and activities. For example, the owner of a company is afraid to introduce a new product on sale, because no one knows what the payback will be. However, taking a risk, this person will be able to make a triple profit, rather than if he adhered to the strategy "the quieter you drive, the further you will be."
2. Another basic quality of a successful person is self-confidence. The leader never doubts this, having high (or above average) self-esteem. It is confidence that helps him to take risks, think critically, make responsible decisions and not be afraid to make mistakes. It is confidence that reinforces faith in the personality of the leader, when not two or three people gather for him, but hundreds of people.
3. Reliability is an equally important quality. Not to fail at the right moment is a skill that is not given to everyone. The leader must be responsible and understand what role he has in this world when he directs those who follow him. Accordingly, all actions and deeds should be consistent and thought out to the smallest detail, and not performed in a chaotic manner.

Self-development

The path to success is thorny and has many pitfalls. To get a desire, it is important to have another trait - to be able to work on yourself, starting from a conscious age and ending with the last breath. This quality is called self-development. It does not matter what a person will study - auto mechanics for work or the heat death of the Universe.

Self-development increases our intelligence, makes us literate and knowledgeable in many areas. This trait allows you to get what you want from life without spending too much resources (time, strength or emotion). For this you need:

• Make time for books. It is believed that a successful person, mostly rich, reads 1-2 books a month. At the same time, it is not necessary to give preference only to thematic business books, but also to read classics, new works, articles, bestsellers.
• Open up new areas, regardless of work activity. Contrary to stereotypes, a person must grow and develop. This is our evolution, in constant learning. If you are a pediatrician, then no one will judge if you learn to play the guitar in your free time. It all depends only on your perception and desires.

Spirituality, or the Beginning of the Path

Spirituality is the harmony of a person with his soul. Also, this trait can be described as a set of moral values, culture, conscience, upbringing and enlightenment. Spirituality is exactly the quality that makes us people who have entered a new evolutionary era. In this case, the very concept of harmony does not necessarily have to be in a religious sense.

Even if a person does not believe in any deities, this does not mean that one should neglect ethics, culture, art or self-development. Spirituality allows you to find a common language with others, maneuver in conflict situations and achieve desire, using only eloquence and education, and not a club or a withered stick.

Assertiveness

Perhaps, without assertiveness, the leader would not have stood at the helm and the lives of hundreds of people would not have been entrusted to him. This personality trait is a tendency to prove his point of view to others, to put pressure on them or even to impose his opinion, desires. At the same time, assertiveness is far from the worst trait, because it allows you to literally open doors with your foot.

Let's give an example: a fairly successful firm posted a vacancy for a sales manager. They see the new employee as bold, outgoing, and creative. Each of us, seeing such a vacancy with a decent salary, believes that the new experience is within their reach. However, out of 10 people, only one can cope, who is not afraid to look in the eyes during a conversation, clearly answer questions and ask along the way those of interest. Assertiveness is a sign of self-confidence. This means that such a person will be able to grow and develop, going forward not only himself, but also leading a whole company. Assertiveness is a sign of a decisive personality who not only expresses her thoughts clearly, but also respects the opinions of others.

Sometimes this quality can be harmful, because it assumes that a person will go on a ram, sweeping away everything in his path. However, a collision is inevitable in this case. It is important to observe not only the framework of decency, but also permissiveness. Assertiveness, especially uncontrollable, can lead to incompetence, because such people do not feel when to stop or change the course of events. Tactfulness is connected to this quality.

Other traits, no less important

Tactfulness is the ability to feel the emotions of other people, their state and mood. This trait allows you to either compliment a person or offend him. You also need to learn tactfulness by studying the psychology and characters of people.

The qualities that will help to achieve success in life include independence (willingness to embark on a new path), courage, creativity (thinking outside the box), independence (study of work processes and the inclusion of logic), will and personal opinion. All these traits will make you not only a wealthy person, but also a happy, worthy, respected one.

The desire to achieve something in life and to become a successful person is one of the basic desires of most people. But desire alone is usually not enough. To figure out “how to become successful?”, At one time I was helped by the book of Richard St. John “The Big Eight. Results of the largest study of successful people. " It can rightfully be considered number 1 in the topic of achieving success.

How to become a successful person in life?

The author of the book, Richard John himself, is a telling example of how an ordinary guy independently achieved success in life. He created the company "The St. John Group ”, which allowed him to earn millions of dollars, won the highest awards in his field, received a black belt in judo, and also made many ascents to the highest mountains in the world.

Writing the book itself began one day on an airplane when Richard was flying to a TED conference. Next door was a schoolgirl from a poor family. She looked at him for a long time and asked one simple question: "Are you a successful person?" At this time, Richard felt uncomfortable, because he could not really answer her. This girl deprived him of peace for as much as 10 years.

Arriving at the conference, Richard realized that he was surrounded by successful people everywhere. So why not ask them what helped them achieve success, and then tell the whole world about it. And then the real work began, as a result of which he interviewed over 500 successful people, including Richard Branson, Bill Gates, the founders of Google and others.

To understand what is still common between successful people, I interviewed representatives of different professions. From A to Z. The list under the letter "a" included, among others, actors, astronauts, astrophysicists, athletes, architects, authors, and so on. I have spoken to more than one representative of every profession. Let's say I interviewed five astronauts and six world-renowned architects. I also made it a rule to interview very famous and completely unknown people. Among the former were corporate presidents, billionaires, and celebrities. And among the latter there are people who do not talk much about, but who calmly and confidently change the world for the better. They could be the winners of the Paralympic Games or the Best Parent of the Year competition. In the control group, I included those who did not achieve any particular success in life.

In addition, St. John began to analyze other people's interviews published on the Internet and social networks, books, newspapers, as well as on radio and television. As a result, the useful content was outlined and put into a database that, in Richard's words, "grew to millions of words." Then Richard spent several years analyzing all the data, highlighting the factors that ensure success.

The result is 8 qualities that a person needs for a successful life. And most importantly, they are not congenital. All successful people have developed them in the course of their activities. Therefore, everyone can become a successful person. The whole secret of success lies precisely in the development of these qualities! And how to do it Richard St. John tells in his book "The Big Eight".

WATCH A VIDEO!8 qualities for success

8 basic qualities of a successful person

1. Passion: Successful people love what they do.

2 Hard work: They work very hard.

3 Concentration: They focus on one thing, not all.

4. Ability to overcome oneself: they force themselves to act.

5. Creativity: they generate new ideas.

6. Self-improvement: They are always improving themselves and their work.

7. Ability to serve people: they offer quality services.

8. Perseverance: they move towards the goal, regardless of the time, setbacks and vicissitudes of fate.

PASSION

The first and most important quality of all successful people is love for their work. Yes, all qualities are important, but PASSION needs to be put at the top of the list. Many people who grew up in poverty say that it was passion that helped them reach unprecedented heights. It's amazing how much we can achieve if we love what we do! It can be said unequivocally that passion is the key to success.

The only path to genuine satisfaction is through work that you consider outstanding. And the only way to make your work outstanding is through your love for what you do.

Steve Jobs, Apple CEO

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But the main problem here is to find this very passion. In this case, all people can be divided into two types: struggling and seeking. The first ones understood their purpose, do what they like and fight to achieve their goal. The latter do not have a clear idea of ​​their passion and must, as quickly as possible, find it. If you, like me, are already struggling, then congratulations. And if you are still a seeker, then know that you are not alone!

LOVE

The second quality that will help you become a successful person in life is hard work. Indeed, labor is a price to pay to enter the territory of success. All successful people, regardless of their industry, work hard for many hours a day. And they also think a lot about their work, even without being on it. And this is only because this is not a work of compulsion, but an activity for pleasure.

For nine years in a row I played for fun. And we won many championships.

Michael Jordan, basketball superstar

But let's see things realistically. Do hard workers always enjoy their work? Of course not. There are things that do not bring much joy, but which have to be done. The task is to support the Pareto law: 80% to have fun, and the remaining 20% ​​to do what cannot be called pleasure. If the ratio is different, then you are clearly not doing your business.

CONCENTRATION

The third personal quality of successful people is the ability to focus. Deep mastery of any profession to the level of a master implies that you cannot do this for a week and then take on another. To be successful in any endeavor, be it a career, a project, or a single goal, means focusing on it for months, years, or even decades.

I followed my dream and was always focused on it. I never gave up. Concentrate.

Peter Marks, famous pop musician

During the day, you have about 60,000 different thoughts. But you cannot succeed in everything. Sometimes it is difficult to achieve something meaningful even in one endeavor. Therefore, it is so important to develop concentration of attention in oneself. And this can be done thanks to 2 things: purposefulness and getting rid of distractions. Therefore, many successful people left the hustle and bustle so that no one interfered with them.

ABILITY TO OVERCOME YOURSELF

The fourth personal quality in order to become successful is the ability to force yourself to do something necessary. Overcoming ourselves helps us to get through difficult times and do things that we would like to avoid. Successful people have a knack for overcoming shyness, doubt, and even fear. They transcend boundaries. They transcend convention. They overcome expectations. And they force themselves to do what life requires of them.

Force yourself to act. Be persistent. You can't just sit and wait for something from life.

Leslie Westbrook, Marketing Consultant

One of our biggest internal barriers is self-doubt. Too many successful people often have doubts about what they are doing and feel insecure about it. There will always be doubts - just listen to your inner voice. Even though today something is not working out, but you need to continue to work. Conquer yourself through challenging goals, challenging tasks, self-discipline, or a golden kick from other people.

CREATIVITY

The fifth quality of successful people is the ability to generate great IDEAS. It is a very powerful source of thought energy. The better your ideas are, the more energy you can move forward. But the ideas themselves are not always easy to come up with. And when that happens, we often like to shout "Eureka"! Each of us is capable of generating good ideas. It's just that the skill of creativity needs to be developed.

When people ask me, “Where do I start my own business?” I tell them, “You must have an idea that everyone else thinks is crazy. And you still develop and implement it ”.

Bill Lowe, CEO of AudioQuest

Ideas are essential for success in any business, including business. Business is as creative as art. But for some reason, many people do not consider themselves creative just because they do not write or paint with paints. Creativity itself does not imply only artistic skills. It means the ability to generate ideas. And if it doesn't work out, then you can borrow and improve, but just not steal.

ABILITY FOR SELF-IMPROVEMENT

To become a successful person, you need not stop in the process of working on yourself. The ability to constantly improve oneself is very important and there is even a term "continuous self-improvement". Successful people are constantly working on the development of new qualities and skills, striving to do their job better and better. It's just an endless process.

Getting better is hard work. But you can't retreat.

Brian McLeod, Blind Golf Champion

Continuous self-improvement has three components.

1. Do OK.

2. Do BETTER AND BETTER.

3. Strive to do something FINE.

ABILITY TO SERVE PEOPLE

The seventh trait that unites all successful people is the ability to SERVE others. The word "serve" is often misunderstood. This is not service in the usual sense in a restaurant and far from charity .. First of all, it is the ability to think about others, to work for them, creating various knowledge, products or services. It is very important for yourself to decide who you serve and what values ​​you give.

You can get whatever you want out of life by helping other people get what they want.

Zig Ziglar, famous writer and lecturer

Most people these days prefer to serve themselves rather. Additional motives must be offered to make them want to serve others. But which ones? First, service can bring you something intangible, like happiness or a fulfilling life. But maybe you are looking for something more specific, something that you can hold in your hands? What do you think of a fat sack of big money? Remember that serving people is one of the paths to material wealth.

Obstinacy

The eighth and final quality is persistence. Perseverance is so important that there are many other synonyms for its designation: perseverance, determination, willpower, endurance, the ability not to leave the work started. Whatever you call it, but this quality means the ability to move towards the goal, despite failure, pain, criticism, negative attitude, rejection and other rubbish.

10 years of darkness preceded my success ... I wrote from ten in the evening until three in the morning. And so for 10 years.

Remember, there is no "instant success." It's a very long journey with many failures. There are many examples proving the correctness of the statement: the more you fail, the closer you are to success. For example, it took Edison 10,000 tries to invent the light bulb. Nobody will tell you how long it will take. But obviously it is thousands of hours!

By studying the nature of success and interviewing people, I remained objective and intentionally positioned myself outside the process. But when I finally systematized the results of my work, I asked myself a very personal question. Have these 8 qualities contributed to my success? Looking back, I say yes. Others achieved success in their own way, I - in my own way, but these 8 qualities unite us all. In the end, I realized how a simple guy like me who barely graduated from high school can become a millionaire. I made a lot of mistakes, but these 8 basic qualities saved me. This means that they can help you too.

Richard St. John, researcher of the nature of success

I think the question "How to become successful in life?" Is now closed for you. It is necessary to develop these 8 basic qualities. There are, of course, others, but you should definitely start with these. And Richard's book turned out to be very clear, informative, creative and useful. I just love these! All on business and without water. And if you are ever asked about your success, tell me that it began with one informative article on the site and an exciting book "The Big Eight"! I wish you success in everything and always!

A self-confident person is a priori in a more advantageous position than the one who doubts. Confident people motivate and inspire, they can lead, they are real leaders. To develop this trait, start exercising - it's not only a plus for your self-esteem, but also for body beauty and health. And do not take the reaction of other people to your actions as a standard of the norm. Do not seek approval from other people - you should live your life comfortable for you, and only you can assess the level of comfort. Learn to take responsibility for your actions.

Learn to say no

Sense of humor

People love people who can laugh at themselves and at the most ridiculous situation they find themselves in. Laughter has the amazing ability to defuse a situation. Start to take everything easier, take everything too close to your heart. Look at how other people behave in a delicate situation, and take an example from them - never sulk over trifles and learn to laugh at yourself. And most importantly - be confident in yourself, because this is the key to success.

High work capacity

This is what most people dream of - to be productive and not burn out, not become a workaholic. In fact, the recipe for productivity is very simple - focus. Turn off the sound on your phone, remove any annoyances (music or TV), and you will notice how much easier it becomes to cope with tasks. The comparison is very appropriate - appetite comes with eating - as soon as you start work, inspiration will come to you. Give up multitasking. The volume of work, of course, is higher, but the quality is significantly reduced, and even the body is under stress. It is also very important to eat and sleep in moderation.

The ability to "read" people

Mind reading is, of course, more of a superpower, but sometimes you just need to pay attention to how a person behaves, how he talks to you, maybe hints at something. Become more observant, pay attention to the manners of people, how they communicate with different interlocutors. And just draw your own conclusions. By the way, this is a pretty addicting game.

Charisma

Surely among your acquaintances there is a person who, in your opinion, is liked by absolutely everyone. This is called charisma. If desired, everyone can develop this trait in themselves. Make eye contact with the interlocutor, but do not be too persistent, learn to listen and hear people. Ask questions, make the person you are communicating with the center of the conversation. Never hide your emotions. If you like what the other person says, tell him about it. If you are offended, confess. Draw conclusions at the end of the conversation - what people like about you and what they don't.

Self-control

One of the most "difficult" character traits in terms of mastering. Self-control is the ability to control emotions and behavior. It is he who helps us to achieve our goals. You can talk a lot about self-control, but first of all, you need to learn how to read the signals of your body and correctly decipher them. At the first stage, it is important to learn how to restrain simple reactions - rudeness, a desire to raise your voice, and others. Just put yourself above it. Over time, you will understand how easy it is.

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Many people believe that personality traits are what we have from birth. Someone was already born with a sense of humor, while someone was just lucky to grow up to be a charismatic person. Therefore, we often do not even think about embarking on the path of developing our own personality. Of course, something is given to us easier and easier, but on something we have to constantly work and train. However, in fact, there is no such positive personality trait that you could not develop in yourself in order to become even more attractive and more successful.

We are in site collected exactly those character traits that you can develop in yourself for a successful and happy life.

Self confidence

Confident people always have an advantage over doubters, because it is strong personalities that inspire others and control the course of events. According to the study, confident people earn more and move up the career ladder faster.

Exercise: A sense of composure and a sense of control over the body builds stability, both physically and emotionally. Stop seeing other people's reactions to your actions as rules to be followed. Don't seek outside approval. A confident person controls his own life, bearing responsibility for his actions.

Ability to say no

All it takes to be effective is focus. Turn off instant messengers, phone sound, do not listen to music if it distracts you. Immerse yourself completely in the task that needs to be done. As appetite comes with eating, inspiration comes with work. When you are constantly twitching, it is difficult for the brain to readjust itself. And what is given to the brain with difficulty, we consider unpleasant. Therefore, motivation decreases.

In addition, you need to establish a daily routine: sleep and eat enough so that it does not interfere with work.

The ability to read other people

Many people are sure that the ability to read minds is in the category of superpowers and for this you need to be a psychic, but this is not at all the case. It is enough just to listen to what they say and not think out more. Do not think out for a person, do not conduct mental dialogues with him.

You communicate, for example, with a person for some time. And then he abruptly disappears, and you wonder: how did this happen? After all, everything was fine. And then it turns out that nothing was normal. You wanted to meet, and he fed you "breakfasts", fervently promising to see you next time. Regardless of the valid reasons, whoever wants to meet will always find the time. Empty promises are nothing more than courtesy.

Did the person confess to you in feelings and for you it became like a bolt from the blue? Because before that, you did not pay attention to the fact that he distinguished you from everyone else, often wrote, asked how you were doing, and took the initiative.

To guess the motives of other people, to understand the reasons for their behavior, it is enough just to pay attention to what they say and what they are doing, where they are looking and to whom they are smiling. Compare these things and draw conclusions. Of course, you don't have to do this all your free time.

The ability to attract people

Some people are so charming that everyone seems to like them. These people have charisma, a quality that anyone can develop.

When communicating, try to establish eye contact: look at the interlocutor with a relaxed and calm gaze, smile. Charismatic people know how to listen to the interlocutor and be on the same wavelength with him. Therefore, do not rush to post information about yourself, it is better to ask questions to him. Do not suppress your emotions if you are told something offensive - show that you do not like it. But not just a boring lecture, but ending the conversation. Go to the bar or the toilet, or just translate the topic.

Answer frankness with frankness, if you like. After all, a person has opened up to you, open yourself up to you.

The ability to control the reactions of your body

Simpler reactions like irritation, rude outbursts or raising your voice can even be stopped by simply pulling yourself together in time.