How to decide for a new life. How to decide to start your own business. Psychological advice that will motivate you to take action

Once I was faced with a choice: move to Moscow or stay in Yekaterinburg? This question was posed by my supervisor. The alternative was this: if you stay, you have to quit; if you move, you will still be demoted. The choice was complicated by the time limit. The manipulative director demanded an answer during the day.

After the first shock passed, I rushed to call my friends and ask for advice. Everyone advised differently, but I understood only one thing: they all advised themselves if they were in the same situation. And I needed an answer that was right for me. I really wanted to accept. My wise friend was the only one who advised to get rid of the time limit first, and then calmly think about the question.

Then I came to the manager and said that I needed time to think, and if the answer is really needed now, then it is "no". When I have time to weigh everything, it can be positive. It turned out that the management valued me more than I expected. I was given a week. It was already possible to do something with this.

Once upon a time I read the book "Tips for a manager" by Tatyana Soldatova. There was an interesting technique called "Effectsomer". I'll tell you about it another time, if procrastination does not completely defeat me. :) At the end of the description of this technique there was a paragraph on how to make a choice based on it - you need to balance the situation.

Balance is an accounting term that means account balance. Usually the difference between income and expenses.

I divided the leaf into four parts. On the left, I wrote the pros and cons of the current situation (or the situation to stay in Yekaterinburg). On the right, I wrote the advantages and disadvantages of moving to Moscow (I did not like this city then, and there were a huge number of disadvantages). Only when I wrote all the pros and cons, next to the written paragraph, put down the importance of this criterion for me on a 100-point scale. How much negative or positive emotions I experience or will experience with the reality of each of the listed criteria.

Stay in Yekaterinburg		Move to Moscow
+		+
Save your friends	90	The opportunity to gain experience	80
Do not change the way of life	60	Accommodation provided	100
…		…
Total pluses	150	Total pluses	180
−		−
Look for a job	90	Demotion	60
Search for a new home	95	Inconvenient city for life	90
…		…
Total cons	185	Total cons	150
Situation balance (difference)	−35	Situation balance (difference)	+30

»
Then, when the work was completed, all that remained was to summarize and calculate the balance.

So in one evening I realized that the benefits from the move would actually be greater for me. I was just completely confused, because my sixth sense told me a completely different solution. Anyway, in the morning I got up with complete confidence in my decision. The rest of the week I just brought before leaving. It so happened that I didn't need it for thought.

The method does not take into account intuition. But it helps to gain determination to just start acting. And already in the process, you can always unmistakably understand whether the decision was correct or not. And then adjust the situation in the direction you need. After all, there are no decisions made irrevocably.

We so often dream, set goals, make plans, but inner fears prevent us from finally making our dreams come true and starting to act. Due to the fact that people are always afraid of something, many brilliant projects have not been born. In this article, you will find some tried and tested tips to get you started.

Are you sure you need it?
One of the simplest ways to understand if you really want something is to imagine that you have already given up on it. If you regret only the money and time spent, perhaps this is not what you wanted. Sometimes plans and ideas are imposed on us by our environment, because everyone around us insists that your project is cool and profitable. And sometimes we just need to bring something new into life, and we confuse a hobby with our life's work, in which we need to invest not only money, but also our soul.

You need a plan
When we make a detailed plan for ourselves, our goal no longer seems so unattainable. It is necessary to detail the next year, you can divide it into months or even weeks. It is possible that something will change over the course of a year: some stages will turn out to be failures, while others, on the contrary, will be very successful. The main thing is not to give up and not give up, because even failures are absolutely normal in business, and any entrepreneur can confirm this. And after you've made your plan, take a look and think about where you can start. Can you make a call or make an appointment? Don't put it off, because you always need to start acting right here and now.

Look at your fears
What are you afraid of? Write down all your fears, and opposite each one - what needs to be done to avoid such an outcome.
Are you afraid that your product will not be interesting to anyone? Do not give in to your own doubts, it is better, for example, to conduct an anonymous survey on social networks.
Are you afraid of losing money? You should not invest all the funds at once, because for a start you can purchase a small batch of goods.
Are you afraid to lose? And you should not tune yourself to losing, you need to do everything possible to make everything work out. and think only of the good.
When you start working with your fears, you can calmly draw up a plan of action, which you will slowly begin to follow, overcoming all obstacles step by step.

Now take a look at the benefits
As you know, thoughts are material, therefore it is also necessary to think and imagine the desired outcome. Visualize your desires, you can also create a mood board or describe in words how you imagine your project in 5-10 years.
Think more positively, so anxiety and fears will gradually recede, and it will be easier for you to move towards your goals.

Share your plans
Of course, this advice is only suitable for the most daring. Don't be afraid to share your plans and ideas on social media, challenge yourself. Set a goal for yourself, build an action plan and share with your friends how you are going to your dream. Firstly, it will stimulate you and will not let you back down, and secondly, you will also gain support from your friends, which is very important.

Remember that you need to start acting today, because putting everything on the back burner, you will not notice how the day will come when it is too late to make this dream come true. Remember that being wrong is not scary at all, really scary is to miss your chance without even trying.

Everyone has a dream that we really want to fulfill, but we cannot decide everything. There is not enough energy, motivation ... Things are not in turn. In short, no dream!

But it is dreams that make our life brighter. We feel alive when we do what we like.

How to make sure that the dream does not remain just a dream? Here's my step-by-step guide to making your dreams come true.

1. Challenge yourself

The first step is to create an impulse that will pull you out of the state of indecision. Do something extraordinary, out of the ordinary, to swing yourself for change.

Here is one story for you as an example.

After several months of preparation and training, she entered the competition and returned from there as a different person. No, she didn’t become a master of sports in dog sledding and didn’t do it anymore. She quit her job and started changing her life.

When a person cannot budge, he first needs to feel what it is like to be gambling, alive, light and happy. Therefore, I advise you first of all to do what will give you adrenaline. There are a lot of options, the main argument is goose bumps. From thoughts about what goosebumps run? So do it.

2. Deal with your fears

The biggest obstacle to dreaming is our fears. They are like invisible walls that prevent us from moving forward. It's time to meet them face to face and sort things out once and for all.

Take a piece of paper and write down the numbers from 1 to 10. Now, within ten minutes, write down all your fears. What bad will happen if you start to fulfill your dream? What are you afraid of and what is stopping you? List all the worst options and stories where everyone laughs at you and stops communicating. Don't think, just write. The list can be longer.

So now look at your fears with an appraising eye. On paper, they are no longer as scary as in the head. Plus, you can now just cross them out.

Examine each fear on your list. Where did he come from? How real is it? Should you consider it and let it influence your life?

3. Take the first step

Surely you think that without a thorough dream you cannot achieve it. But reality shows that the plan almost never works exactly the same. The most important action at this point is to take the first step.

Imagine that your path to your dream is an addicting computer game with an unpredictable plot. Now only the first level is open for you. Gradually, more and more levels will open to you. Everything is the same in life. At first, you have only one option, but then more doors will open in front of you.

When I started blogging, I also didn't know where this would lead. But if I had not taken this step, then it is unlikely that I would now have two of my own books.

There are so many possibilities around you. It's time to try at least one of them. After all, you have to start somewhere?

4. Don't give up

Desire alone is not enough to achieve your dream.

There is an expression: "Success is 99% of labor and 1% of talent." If you still haven't done what you like, simply because you don't have the talent for it, then these are just excuses. There is a huge amount of work behind every success story. There are hundreds and thousands of hours of work. If you see someone who was able to fulfill your dream, then he just started earlier. That's all.

Believe in yourself. Do not give up. And then you will definitely succeed.

For even more inspiration, see my books 100 Ways to Change Your Life. Part One "and" 100 Ways to Change Your Life. Part two" .

Sometimes it seems that everything in life is not going as it should, thoughts are randomly scattered in the head, and doubts about the correctness of our actions torment every day and haunt us. Something needs to be changed. But what? How to start a new life so that relatives are proud, others respect, and self-esteem, like a phoenix, is reborn from the ashes? To do this, you need to work hard on yourself. In this article, I will give you 30 practical tips for starting a new life.

Life is wonderful, isn't it? We are constantly reminded of this by our inner voice, which so loves to give us hints. If you have a sudden desire to start a new life from scratch, do not drive it away. On the contrary, treat it as a sign that it's time to raise the sail of your own frigate called "Life" and start moving forward with renewed vigor.

Many successful people started out by working on their own development. 1% talent and 99% labor are the secret to true success. Don't be afraid of change. We must act decisively and irrevocably.

After all, starting to change for the better is so interesting and exciting ... It is a challenge to positive emotions and motivation to conquer new heights. The advice that I offer you in this article, I hope, will make you at least think about your priorities and habits.

Spend time with “those” people.

You should not waste your life on those who squeeze every last drop of juice out of you. You will always be taken care of by the one to whom you are dear, the one who wants you to have a place in his life. And he will do everything to make you feel comfortable with him. Be sure to give gifts to such people - this is one of the manifestations of love. Pick up gifts.

It is worth remembering that good friends are those who stay with you even if your affairs are very bad, and not those who are eager to support you when everything is cool with you. Life is too short to waste your time with the “wrong” people.

Solve your problems, don't run away from them.

Learn to take a blow of any force. Go out one on one with a problem and give it a heat, blow it to smithereens. Life does not tolerate the weak. Therefore, it teaches us by knocking us down until we adapt.

Of course, we will not be able to solve absolutely all problems, but trying to do something is within the power of everyone. We may have to fall more than once, but we fall only in order to rise.

Don't be afraid to be wrong.

Better to try and make a mistake than to do nothing at all. Whoever tries to be smart about the need to draw conclusions from the mistakes of someone else and learn from them, remember that we learn only from our mistakes, not from others.

Any failure can lead you to success, and any success is fraught with traces of past failures.

Don't try to imitate someone.

Being yourself is so much cooler. This world drives everyone to dance to one tune, trying to make sure that no one is any different from each other. Therefore, most people work hard to be like their idols, acquaintances or someone else.

Everyone has their own life. Yes, someone will always be more beautiful than you, someone younger, and someone smarter, but all of them will never be you. Someone who values you will always love you for being who you are. Therefore, you should not try to change yourself to someone's joy.

Let go of the past forever.

There is no need to cling to it. It is impossible to change what was. You wondered how to start all over again, remember? So, you will never be able to start in a new, as long as you hold on to the old. A new chapter of a book begins only when the old one ends ...

Be honest with yourself.

It is possible to start a new life and improve it at times only when we take risks, and the first and most difficult thing for us is not to lie to ourselves.

Unlearn to push your personal needs into the background.

Remember, you and your life are exceptional. Uniqueness should get a chance for development. That's what is really scary - to forget about your uniqueness and put all your strength into love for someone else.

No, you shouldn't leave those you love. Just don't forget about yourself. Learn to find time for yourself and ... create, do what is really important to you, without stopping at anything.

Never beat yourself up for making mistakes.

Life, throwing us more and more tests, makes us wrong. Someone scolds himself for having fallen in love with the wrong person, but someone for having committed some stupidity ... Look at this from a different, positive angle. It is worth starting to think differently.

If you had not made a mistake once, you would not have met your spouse, you would not have got a good job today, or you would not have lived where you live now ...

There are many examples, but the essence is the same. You are you, here and right now, not your mistakes that were once committed. You have a great chance to start building your future. So start finally demolishing bricks to the construction site!

Give up all attempts to buy yourself happiness.

It's impossible! Such simple things as love, joy, laughter, work on your own feelings are absolutely free.

Stop looking for someone to find happiness.

Deal with your cockroaches in your head first. You need to start creating stability in your life. You will not become happier in a relationship until you are happy with yourself, with your personality.

Stop messing around.

It won't get you anywhere. Life does not like lazy people. Take action now. Your whole life is a movement, and I explained this clearly and easily in one of my articles. and draw conclusions.

Do what makes you feel good about yourself ...

One must go into a new life with a willingness to work and plow. Don't hesitate to make decisions. Do not think too long, otherwise out of the blue you will draw yourself another problem, which might not have been. Act decisively and take risks where you can.

Do not torment yourself with doubts that you are not ready for something.

Let me tell you a little secret: no one feels 100% ready for anything. We stop feeling comfortable as soon as we see serious opportunities in front of us. We experience discomfort at the level of thinking. That's the way a person is.

There is no need to get involved in a relationship with the bay-flounder, just like that.

I'm talking about love. Take your time to choose a person. Consider, weigh all the pros and cons, evaluate your feelings and feelings, and only then make your choice. Relationships are built wisely, not haphazardly.

Dive into the waters of love when you feel ready, not at the first inner urge of loneliness. Depression can be fought. How? Read on.

There is no need to whip up a fever and send new relationships to the devil when the old ones did not work out.

It's just that you have not yet met someone who will love you for being “just that”.

Don't look at everyone as competitors.

Life is so arranged that someone will always be more successful than you. You need to start developing a new strategy, focusing on your own achievements. Fight with yourself, not with someone else.

Don't be jealous.

Stop complaining about everything and feeling sorry for yourself.

Life rolls the dice for you. Thanks to these cubes, she guides you along one way or another. By constantly complaining about something, you can miss a lot of important things.

You need to understand and wind up everything that is happening around. And by constantly complaining, you will lose concentration and immerse yourself in a world of eternal problems. Show people that you are doing well by smiling often.

Drive hate away.

Taking offense at someone and hating him all your life is only to your detriment. I even advise you to delete the word "hate" from your vocabulary. It only attracts negative energy. Do not forgive the hurt, but just forget about it, and you will find peace.

Don't stoop to the level of others.

The bar should always be held and worked to raise it.

Don't strain yourself into explanations.

A friend doesn't need them, and the enemy just won't believe you. Do not waste time and energy on this.

Learn to stop and think in time.

No need to run in circles. Stop, figure out "what is what and how," and decide what to do in this situation. Protect yourself for a while from what is happening and true thoughts will visit you.

Don't neglect the simple little things.

Life is full of pleasant little things - enjoy them. In the future, you will treat these memories as important moments in your life.

Do not try to bring everything to perfection.

You can do better, but not perfect. Then again you want to improve what you have already improved, etc. You end up wasting a lot of time.

Don't go around obstacles.

Be extraordinary and choose the hard path instead of the easy one if your goal is success. Life does not give gifts to those who follow the path of least resistance.

Don't pretend that everything is fine if it isn't.

No one is capable of being strong all the time. Pay if necessary. The sooner you do this, the sooner you smile again. It is always pleasant to give a "new" smile to people.

Don't blame others for problems.

You yourself are responsible for your life and actions. The dream will never come true if you constantly lose control of your sense of responsibility.

Don't burn yourself up trying to be everything to everyone.

Please only one person and his world can change ...

Don't worry in vain.

Frequent excitement strongly affects the nervous and cardiovascular system. Nothing will change from your worries. Save yourself and your precious nerves. ...

Learn to focus only on what you really want.

Put all unnecessary thoughts aside and focus on positive thinking. It can move cities. Anyone who believes that every day can bring happiness, over time, notices that it is.

Don't be ungrateful.

Even if your affairs are bad, say "thank you" at least for the fact that you are alive and you have a roof over your head and bread for tomorrow.

Life is an interesting thing. She constantly tests us for strength and endurance. The weak become strong, the strong become weak, and the loafers continue to discuss both. Appreciate the moments and develop spiritually, friends.

How I decided to start my business from scratch... I'll tell you about how I quit what I was doing for many years, that is, I quit going to work and started trying to make a living not working for someone, but working for myself. It was a long time ago, almost a year has passed, and of course a lot has changed, but I will start my story from the very beginning of my story. Well, along the way, I will share various useful information and my own insights.

Solution ... this is the starting point.

Starting your own business is the same as starting a new life..

Everything is changing dramatically, the familiar world is transforming. At first, I had unusual sensations, the work strained me greatly, I did not like it, it took a lot of energy, and I also had to move around the country, live in some rented huts, or it was not at all clear where. These are all the reasons why I decided to quit my job for the sake of the illusory opportunity to find my own business and become financially independent ( well, or in case of failure, look for a new job). Therefore, in the beginning there was just a thrill, a feeling of freedom, as if he had dropped an unbearable load from his shoulders.

Making life-changing decisions is tricky. You can be where you don't want to be for years, do what you don't like, but hesitate ... life goes on and on in a circle, you get used to it, and then where to go? It's always unknown. Over the years, this ability to rush forward is lost, it is replaced stability... That is how this word appears in life, life becomes kind of stable. But this is self-deception. At any moment you can be fired, the work itself can hide behind, a crisis like a wave can wash overboard. So any stability in this world is mostly illusory.

Own business requires more responsibility.

Such a simple thought did not reach me right away. We need to take all responsibility upon ourselves, no one will come to the rescue, except for me, no one is responsible for me. It is not enough to go with the flow, you need to set the sail and catch the tailwind, and if it is not there, then grab the oars and row. In life, as a rule, there is little responsibility, not that we rely on others. I washed away in the fact that you often attribute the cause of failures to someone, to some insurmountable event or to your own shortcomings. It gets a little easier, life just happens ... it's time to end it.

It also takes a lot more self-discipline to start a business than I had when I worked for uncle... At work there was external motivation, various incentives and work - this is an organized system where everyone has their own role, bosses and subordinates. And when you start to work for yourself, then there is no more motivation from the outside, you need to generate it yourself, there is no system, you need to create it. There is no demand from you, and this is very relaxing, you need to learn to ask yourself on your own.

Many as reason well, my own business ... it needs money, the idea of this very business, luck, knowledge, experience ...

Well, that's what I thought about. I prepared myself, saved up some money, solved the housing issue, found a couple of ideas that will be discussed later, found several training courses. Well, actually I didn't have anything else.

But the most important thing I forgot, I didn’t even plan it, I didn’t think it over and didn’t take it into account.

**How to become by this very businessman?**

And start your own business.

Most probably read these books about business, where gurus of all stripes share their experiences. When you read these books, you agree, but the information received remains somewhere in the backyards of your memory, without turning into action. But in vain ...

Realization of this came to me after about six months, it could have been earlier if I had been smarter, but alas. Moreover, I knew all this, but did not realize it and did not use it.

It's about a way of thinking, a way of solving problems and self-organization. The main thing is to restructure your thinking. If this is not done, everything else loses its meaning.

This is what ignoring the above leads to:

Not doing.

I have already said that I decided to start an Internet business. As a preparatory step, I decided to study several video courses on marketing in order to learn how to promote a product. It seems logical. Fortunately, these courses are like uncut dogs. A dime a dozen. And you don't need to buy anything, the main thing is to find the right forum, where everyone distributes it for free. Of course, by this I encourage piracy, but when you see the price tag of an information product under 40 thousand, and you have planned to take more than one course or two, then you cease to be scrupulous.

And this is what the situation turned out to be, I studied, prepared, began to keep records, but in life nothing changed, just as I had no business and I had no income. Another month passed, and things are still there.

And what else happened, I did something all day, worked at the computer, studied. But at the end of the day, I could hardly say what I did specifically, you look back at the past day, and he is in a fog. And there was still not enough time to do everything.

I named this state not doing.

I studied courses, consumed a lot of information and did nothing else, I was just getting ready to take action. But I never started , here's another course I'll go through and then I'll definitely start, shovel loot with a shovel but it didn't. I was marking time. Then I took a closer look at those who, just like downloading tons of courses, they were mostly in the same trap. We talked in correspondence about the hard drive crammed with useful info, looked for something fresh, but in terms of achievements, they were at complete zero.

In general, a sad situation, a cure for it, not another motivational course, but doing.

It must be done stupidly.

A simple recipe, but how difficult it is to execute, try it and you will understand what I mean. After all, it is so comfortable not to do, to study, to plan, to prepare, to wait for better conditions ... Get it out of your head, if you want to start your own business, go change your life, just start doing, right or wrong is the second question, the main thing is to develop it, acquire it skill of doing (this will be discussed in another article).

But that is not all…

I found in myself two global mistakes of thinking that jeopardized all my plans.

Firstly I noticed that when I plan a project (for example, abandon work and start my own business on the Internet), I miss a lot of details. The analysis of the situation and prospects comes out superficial and too positive, as if with a blindfold on his eyes. And when it subsides, it is already late, you are already in the middle of the path. So I did not take into account, a whole bunch of nuances, I did not detail all the options, I decided based on superficial data. This is a terrible mistake. Success in small things that are not noticeable at first sight, magic at your fingertips.

Secondly. There are people who leave their jobs to gain independence and independence in finances, they have ideas and projects. But time passes and they return to what they left, nothing came of it. They cite global injustice, fate, high competition, lack of money and a hundred other reasons, shifting responsibility from themselves. But the reason is different in some cases. This is fucking business thinking again.

I came to such a formula for success as a result of my mistakes. But it took a long time to get this formula up and running. It's hard to change. You also need emotional restraint, of course, sometimes after a series of failures, a feeling of hopelessness and a spark of despair rolls over, but I learned how to fight back. This is a difficult path, but it is worth it, I hope I go through it, which I will write about later on the pages of this blog.

In conclusion, I summarized the main thoughts that will certainly help you on your way to your goal.

A short checklist.

If you decide to go to work and start your own business or have set yourself a serious goal, then first of all format your thinking, along with time, this is our main resource.

Look for strong motivation, develop self-discipline, read how to do it effectively in the following articles ( you can't write everything at once).

Assess your resources, do not plan superficially, think over every little thing, every detail matters. Success lies in these very little things that we did not take into account. The world is too competitive to be successful without elaborating on the little things.

Learn to act, apply information, remember: if you know and do not apply, it is tantamount to knowing nothing. There is no point in simply accumulating knowledge.

That's all ... In the next article, I will talk about my first attempts to make money on the Internet. or join mine